Kash Baloch — Poetry on Identity, Love, and Survival

No longer searching for validation in the faces of foes that are dead behind the eyes, I have grown stronger than ever before, as I realize that a new moon will always rise in my vanilla sky. Although my horizon may have gone grim, growing greyer upon each further glance, I am slowly learning to accept fate, and leave the rest to pomp and circumstance. Creatures of the night, that I once called friends, have become caricatures of themselves; my time alone, and new found inner strength have aided me on my never-ending journey to discover where my dreams now dwell. Enticed and exhilarated, I now see that I am able to pull through and endure, things that others have only feared in the past, I am no longer the curse, but instead, I hold the keys that will unlock the cure. Sycophants sullenly seek to silence the sunrise behind my eyes, flattery once got them everywhere but now I see through the endless lies. Grandiosity, delusions, and schizophrenic rants and raves, will...

I sit and stare in wonderment, contemplating all the things that could have been, although my own stubbornness prevented me from attaining the joys that I had seen, in dreams. The foolishness inside flickered, went out without a fight, as I crawled through the dark, stumbling, suffocating searching for the light. I am the only thing that stands in my own way, my own worst critic, harshest on the coldest days. I cringe and cower at the concept of a life without conflict, the grass is always greener on the other side as mine always appears to look unfit. I refuse to accept the happiness and bliss that I know I truly deserve, choosing instead to live in a state of constant suffering, internalizing all of the sadness that I observe. The wails inside tremor, shake me like earthquakes of the worst magnitude, as I build up my walls higher, hoping to gain clarity at a greater altitude. Impenetrable fortress that I am, no man will ever break me again, but only because I am m...

Your affected, infection laced ignorance will not function anymore, as you assume that all will forever be forgiven, yet you conveniently forget what we were even fighting for. I gave you many chances, danced for you, and helped you advance. I held your hand through your darkest hour only to become the recipient of your bad romance. Entranced, I stared into your starry eyes hoping you would whisk me away into the sky, only to realize that you were faking it this whole time, choke back your tears, say goodbye, I refuse to remain your greatest war crime. Your Hitler hail can no longer sear my skin, falling from the Heavens only to cover me in sin. You coveted the key to these chains that bound me to your acid rain, bathed me in blisters, that denoted disdain. Virulent vengeance and the vanity it wanted to veer, made it crystal clear that you congealed the bloody cross that I once held so dear. I can play at happy, plaster a smile on my face, and pretend that it is ...

The emptiness soaks in absorbing my body entirely, as it pulls my heart out; it is now obsolete. The security that would once surround me, left loneliness in its place, and has moved onto better streets. My sights were once set so high, now I watch helplessly as the only hope I have is to survive. It depletes everyday, bringing to mind the question of whether I will rot, and then decay. With too much on my plate, I realize I have taken on more than I can handle. The fear that fills me, burning stronger with each day, threatens to be my biggest scandal. In the water, I am beautiful as it washes away my sins. Purifies me like the divine, and reminds me that I am capable of achieving anything. Instead, I choose to remain in this morbid mundane stagnant state that surrounds me with the constant memories of all the things that I truly hate. Wasting away as I wear my heart on my sleeve every time that I go out, only to open myself up and be vulnerable, the thing I most ...

You claimed to be okay and said you were unfazed, but I should have known that you were waiting to set my world ablaze. I wish we could communicate, only then would I know this is all not in vain, if only we could eliminate the aggregate, then our potential would not poison our brains. Concealed caricatures of the person you claimed to be rose to the surface and engaged in battle with me, you claimed to wish me well but only gave me Hell, as you slowly revealed your colours, and came out of your sullen shell. Noxious naiveté that nearly knocked me off my feet, maniacally made me miss the person that I used to be. Your temperamental torture tasted like toxic defeat, seeping into my pores, and then dragging me through the streets. Taxicab confessions, without you I would only stay alive, with you I would surely die, as you contained enough venomous sting to inhabit many beehives. Double sided sword love, either one hurting more than the next; is it even worth it ...

My self love weighs heavy on my heart, and that is why the other me is my greatest counterpart. This black hole wants to pull me deep within, confine me, never console me, and make me bathe in my own sins. The emotional tide turns in and crashes against the shore of my security, as I venture further in and engage in feigned frivolous fatuities. I tried to conceal my past, suppressed it as much as I could, until I came to realize that I had misunderstood. Galaxies of gratitude which we will regale in when I am well, are the same sentiments that send me sorely sailing towards Hell. Vociferous and vile, evil tries to purchase me, only playing for keeps; as I subconsciously proselytize to gain my own flock of wicked sheep. The energy, and chemicals between us are absorbed into my skin, yet I try to flush it all away and drown it in a bottle of bathtub gin. This charade is not enough to break me, nor will it ever be easy to shake. I am still, however, well aware that ...

Plebeian pleasures that only appealed to me in passing moments, idiots so ignorant that were unworthy of my romance. Your failure to ignite the incandescence of my incense, was enough for me to protest, and forget about your pretense. Rapidly realized that you were not ever all that rare, like a steak well done, your time was over before you could claim that you had won. Failed to stun, although you never left home without your glue gun. Glitter was your weapon, but your love was just a rerun. I chose myself instead, refused to settle for passive aggression and its lack of pleasure. I am a treasure, solid gold; a diamond surrounded by casual, catatonic coal. Carefully consoled, I chose to hold myself in closer context, you exacerbated my existence, punished me with your persistence whilst alienating my own assistance. I am the master, you were the muse, when it's all over, get up and leave; you've been used. I only need me, your impermanence transparent; a...

You were my medic as you made the final incision and cut my heart in two. Kept the biggest piece for yourself, the first time you had ever made a decision, now my blood bleeds blue. You doctored the romance, all of it untrue, that made me fall for you. Scalpel sharp, and surgery cold, as you transplanted trust into me, but it was misconstrued. Now I lie waiting in the operating room hoping to be fixed by you; your malpractice resulted in the malignancy of me, which you could never undo. Tremors, shakes, and quivers, ulcers, but somehow your love remains my hunger pain, sprained my trust in you whenever you would stray, but your attention was still enough to make me feel renewed. Now I suffer from the aches of arrhythmia as my heart still beats for you, disengaged from all my favourite places, with my life in dire need of review. My liver threatens to leave me abandoned, yet I still refuse to admit that I have taken to drinking for two. We were a pair that should h...

Your chaos had a melody, that I danced to all day long. The trauma of your design was enough for me to consider losing it all. The recipe of your disaster was the most beautiful song, as I tried to paint with vibrancy to avoid any further falls. The anarchy of your leadership started to flood our town, it took years for me to realize that you would always let me down. Unreliable until the end, I was merely drawn to your disarray; broken now, our looking glass had started to rust, and then decay. Selfish to your core, you were spoiled rotten long before we met, you faltered many times as I forgave countless more, and somehow managed also to forget. You coloured my world with the chaos of your trouble, watched me twist, and turn to your love as my fears ebbed to the surface, and then quickly began to boil, and bubble. Hotter by the second, our saga began too fast, as we raced to reach the finish line, only to lose it all and place dead last. Was it the sorrow behind ...

The oxygen you provided once is more like poison now, as you slit my throat with overbearing love, and the blood spills out. The doubts fill me throughout like carbon monoxide gas, as I have replaced you with another, join the ranks of the second class. Anthrax awareness alarmed me, as your nitrogen nude nuances neglected my reverie, forcing me to set you fluorine free. The chemicals between us ceased to exist in harmony, drastically decreasing the likelihood of the conception of progeny. Your arsenic, aciduous heart resulted in your reaching out to my lovers past in your time of need, future suitors will take heed, of your pathetic, and pitiful ignoble deeds. You claimed to be comprised of krypton, yet you were hardly a noble gas, you played make believe and had me convinced that you were less than a global ass. Chernobyl, and Hiroshima have recovered better than you, as you are now a no man's land, in a state of disrepair that is worse than the Roman ruins. Li...

Twenty four, three too many for the perfect hand in life's biased game of Blackjack, but just enough to strike back with a well memorized massive attack. I compromised too much of myself to lose it all in one round of Russian roulette, paid the cost to be the best, so return my ante, and retain your bets. I will be victorious, I was born to win, effortlessly notorious, it kills my many critics to encounter my resilience. I am no longer the pawn that kept getting knocked down, but I am the king who gets stronger with each round. You were the black queen; wickedness run rampant through your veins, I was always two steps ahead, immune to your endless games. Attention deficit and as blind as the jaded one-eyed Jack, you may have made Jill take a spill, but I am much smarter than that. You said you would go straight and never stray again but you lied, so this royal flushed you away and watched our future die. I have always been adept at doing too much to fast, simil...

Cocaine covered clouds that would cushion and comfort my falls, have ceased to provide security, through life's many curveballs. Methamphetamine dreams laced with paranoia and delusion, solely fill my world with desolation, and crack ignited confusion. Made Mary Jane my mistress, reached out to her when I was down, with an embrace, one simple kiss, she once was able to make me feel so profound. Ecstasy would take me high, and help me soar, gone are the days now when I was a user, I am drugs' whore no more. Acid trip traps that I used as a means to escape, have lost their ability now, to help me forget the many memories of rape. I was once a jaded junkie living amongst the untouchables of North American society, instead I have turned a new leaf, contrived of clarity, and sobriety. I am no longer a victim, nor a product of my environment, it is in my nature to nurture, or else face extinction, and endangerment. Painkillers and opiates that I once thought woul...

My survival has ceased to be dependent on your fickle, fascist regime. I am number one again now, no longer feel the need to be a part of your team. The tears dried on their own as you failed to appropriately feign support; I run freely now as my airplane has been released from death's arid airport. Tossed aside so you could explore other carnal desires, I was merely your whore. Your two-faced heart can beat for me no more, enjoy your latest conquest who seems to be such a bore. I am passion and he is solely lust, stick with him, and accept my curse; the guilt within will turn your love to rust. I can guarantee that your world will fade to black, once you realize that someone truly genuine is everything that you lack. Christened a killer but baptized a brat, your treacherous deeds will make you fall flat. The bloodred wine that flows through your veins, was frigid, ice cold as it tried to make me irrelevant, then certify me mundane. Unbeknownst to you, your at...

My cancer soaked heart is what led me here, leaving me confused, it is more than I can bare. I have never felt so cheap or used, as I battle my foreign fears. I am the sole cause, the muse, for my own dark despair. Night falls as death threatens to strip me of my soul. I know I should fight harder but to what avail? For your vision of love, my frigid heart still tolls. My fountain of youth, you were my holy grail. Crawling through the dark, I searched for the rabbithole that would lead me back to you. Before my soul accepts its fate, and succumbs to heartbreak's fatal flu. Love is a flesh eating virus that poisons your brain; makes you foolishly see beauty in things that are mundane. I thought that I would break the pattern and put an end to this chain, but instead I pull the plug, you win. Watch my hopes and dreams for us as they circle the drain. I gave you all of me, hopelessly, even things that were solely intended for me. Then toyed with your emotion...

My indecision has paved two roads; one made with dreams, the other with gold. With each step forward, I further unload and drift farther away from your hands which I so longed to hold. A future filled with you would never be fickle it would be only be sweet, but desire is a demon, it is a two way street. My heart sees only in blacks and whites, no in-betweens, but the hope inside multiplies like forests filled with evergreens. The eternal flame will always burn as I hold your heart in my hand through the falls from which you will learn. I am your friend, an ally, first and foremost as I sit and await your acceptance of me as your loving host. I will possess you like a child in its mothers womb, like kings from long ago possess their luxurious tombs. Toxic waste landfills and radioactive despair line the boulevards of broken dreams that appeared now that you are no longer here. Biohazardous balloons float to the Heavens then pop, blinding my eyes, when will this mis...

Greyer by the minute, your time ages me each day. Ticking hands that repeat to the beat, bringing me closer to decay. In my grave, you will still count down until you no longer exist as well. The time you thought was real was mere fiction, was designed to give you Hell and reap all of its convictions. Those who chose freedom were the ones who truly lived, as they worked hard to receive the love that they would equally give. Father future, frustrated, feigned satisfaction with his class, as some of his students, us particularly, refused to save the best for last. The water keeps on boiling, creating steam throughout the Earth as a layer of fog and mist are born, making the world and its inhabitants forget their self-worth. We could have been heroes, yet we cowered, hoped to never get caught, as we disdainfully claimed the rewards, the consequences that through our actions we had bought. Waste of life, waste of skin but whose glass house can decide? A lot of us wer...

Your coffee stained heart is devoid of caffeine now, as you buried me alive, in your hostility I drowned. Our white sheets have been dyed red, to match the blood that was spilled, yet a flicker of hope remains that this is just another fire drill. Your cauldron of hatred bubbles over, burning me like the sun's apocalyptic flares, though all I ever wanted was for someone, anyone, to be there. Bravery has abandoned me, there is no courage left in my cowardly lion heart, benevolent but broken before we even had a chance to fill the pages of our lives with beautiful art. Stop, this was all a farce, that has left my memories jaded, and scattered so sparse. Your charade will be a hard act to follow, novocaine numb now with a heart that is twice as hollow. My white flag hangs at half-mast in honour of my demise, as crocodile tears sprout, then sting, as they trail down your face, and stain your sorry eyes. My world was in disarray, as it yearned to be your oyster, now ...

The blues inside my soul ebb and flow as they hit the shore. Some days they are light, and I am still able to make it through the night. But the navy and royal blues blind me to the point where I am unsure of what to do. Self-awareness resides within each fibre, every pore; yet my sorrow remains, guilt, not love, will live here forevermore. The performer in me refuses to quit the show, this facade, although old, is all that I have ever known. Unoccupied and as available as if I've made no plans, the fury at my future grows, why do I refuse to become a man? Every breath that I exhale is filled with endless lies, as I attempt to no avail to conceal the sadness in my melancholy eyes. The notes of youth that once remained became frustrated and then faded. As I fight my many monstrous selves from becoming a joke so jaded. I see the light yet refuse to accept that it may save me; instead I avoid the catalysts that may positively change me. This water is poisoned, murky, dark...

The shouts and screams subside leaving me cowering in fear, yet realizing it's impossible to find somewhere safe to hide from my troubles so dear. This darkness within me, pitch black as forty days of night, has robbed me of my senses, as I have lost my will to fight. These walls I have built so strong come crashing down leaving me in the wake of their destruction, I stand in my own way, evoking insecurities within, I am my only obstruction, and the cause of my own suffering. In an instant, the security blankets I weave are pulled away, provoking me to find another with the ability to comfort me like the sun's golden, effervescent rays. I search high, and then low, hoping to find a cure or reason, but instead get tossed aside, time and time again as if I have committed the worst kind of treason. I lived my life wrapped inside a bubble of hope that has just burst, the pain, and agony that seep through make me believe that nothing could be worse. Now silence pierce...

If imitation is the highest form of flattery, why does your carbon copy of me fill me with rage? Born deficient and inbred, without enough personality to even fill half a page. Your adoration was endearing at first, I wore it like a ribbon, you were the prized pig, until we parted ways, and you continued to assume that you were still as big. I gave you your confidence, yet created a monster in the process, played you like a pawn in a life sized game of Chess. You were pathetic at your best, as you had me fooled to believe that you were different from the rest. Instead, I wish I had seen through your facade, and realized that you were a mistake, and hardly an act of God. Your own mother barely knew whose seed you had sprouted from, with a complete lack of ambition, you were best suited to dwell within the slums like sickening scum. Your rotten teeth were so decayed, your breath reeked of failure, and the foul odour of stale bandaids. The people you assumed were friends laughed a...

Sardonic scars severely surround my seven seas, as critical razorblade kisses caress my sunkissed knees. I can play at happy, plaster a smile upon my frowning face, and pretend that it is all okay. But pretenses never get me far, nor will they create rainbows in my skies that are coloured in greys. Daunting death daringly beckons me asking me to come out and play, yet I refuse to give up, or give in, as I grow stronger with each new dreamfilled day. I disassociate myself from the mundane, and toxic strangers who were once so close, as my friendly future fondly promises that it will never fail to keep me engrossed. Your hatred, once my lullaby, no longer translates into words, as your soul is restless now, without control over me, your heart flutters, and flaps inside you like the clipped wings of a caged bird. All the ups, and downs, and highs, and lows, have poisoned my poetic prose, like coratid kisses from a cancerous, and thorny rose. For every lie you tell, the worse your k...

Child, it's time to grow up before you drink too greedily out of life's cup. Recognize when you are wrong, accept it when you fail, or prepare for a lifetime filled with ships that refuse to sail. The difference between a man and a boy, is that a man always accepts what he cannot change, and is never coy. You are merely a mouse, disguised in man's clothing; the object of my pity, and the epitome of loathing. You cry to the skies, berating God for all of your troubles. Krishna would not even answer you, but instead would let you boil, and bubble. Berating the world for the monkies that sit upon your back, even though all it would take, is retracing your tracks. What is it that changed, and made you so deranged? How did you turn so yellow, when you claimed to be the strongest fellow? Your nine lives are almost over, and you are left with only one; this might as well be 2012 as you emit flares like the sun. You will die soon, and your lack of legacy will be left behi...

Two roads converged at the foot of a snow covered hill, one would surely lead to treasures while the other led downhill. I chose the former, for once in my life, as it glittered like gold. I was ecstatic, and so relieved, to have found someone so dear to hold. You are worth your weight in diamonds, pearls pale in comparison to your smile. The light behind your eyes fills me with wonder, and makes me pray that you will stay awhile. For once, body, heart, soul, and mind agree that you may just be the best thing to ever happen to me. All my troubles seem so far away now that you are near; your ability to listen, selflessly, makes me hopeful for future years. Together we will map the world, sip tea at noon in London, spend midnights in Paris, and then wake up to breakfast in Dublin. We can eat baguettes as we walk through the Parisian rain, dance along the river Seine, then indulge our senses as the Louvre works magic in our brains. My attraction to you is as solid as la tour Eiffel, take ...

Cooler than the summer breeze, I have the power deep inside that brings you crashing down to your knees. You test me with your spitefulness, disdainful as the rose's thorny kiss, yet still I rise higher than the trees that caress the clouds like a trapeze. I am the only one I know in this flock of sheep that dares to question all I hear, my senses may attempt to fool me, yet I am not held up by strings, and you are not my puppeteer. The days they blur into nights, yet the fire inside fails to be doused, my determination has ignited a strength, a will, a promise that remains devout. It fills me with the utmost cheer, as I realize that I remain, consistent until the day I die, stronger with each passing year. I have risen from the ashes, a thousand times, as my wings refuse to catch aflame, paid my dues for many crimes, no longer a victim of your social concept known as shame. You can not hold a candle to me on your brightest day, I am the star that refuses to fall to Earth, I ...

In the middle again, I found myself caught between evil and good. To grandmother's house I go, as I don my cape like Red Riding Hood. Unbeknownst to me, you were always the wolf, so big and bad; the little boy who cried lies, as hot tears stream endlessly onto my writing pad. I sat in the corner and pulled a blade out of my depressing pie, crossed my heart like hot cross buns, as I watched you stick a needle in my eye. You are the muffin man from Drury Lane who fed me cakes full of delusion and drugs, poisoned and delerious as I tried to trade them in for hugs. I left a trail of crumbs in the hopes that I would find my way home soon, pruck my finger on a loom, as I anxiously anticipated the arrival of someone who could make me swoon. This little piggy had dignity, the other piggy had none, as I hoped in my heart of hearts that I would stop tricking myself into believing that you were the one. Even Mary's little lamb would refuse to keep you company, misery will turn the ...

Teardrop waterfalls stain my eyes like the sun that refused to rise, my heart cries endlessly for the man I was supposed to become, numb, I hang my head low, deaf, blind, and now dumb. Enchanted once, but now I turn to distractions instead to make me whole, as the smoke fills the air, disappearing from life's bowl. Grandiose lies, schemes full of wasted effort, and wasted tries. My skin begins to sag, hanging loosely from my bodice, like a novice, I realize that I am my own future's artist. On my own hit list, I became my biggest threat; full of regrets, sadness poured from my soul, drowned my sorrows with toxins until my veins rejected the poison that I injected. Dejected, I object to becoming infected. Always the town fool, the little boy who cried lies, whispers progress into shouts and then screams, as time speeds up, and shows us how it flies. My face, once the cause for envy of many others my age, melted, stripped, and burned off until it showed the underlying rage...

Your smile lights up my days like the morning sun. At night, you illuminate my world, my moon, you are the one. Your eyes filled with fiery embers, radiance emanates deep within, molten rock and lava blow your cover when it's clear that you are suffering. The same eyes that are filled with pools of wonder, with such vast expanses of wisdom that I could get lost. My mind is your playground, and your heart is my home; tell me all your secrets as we set sail for Rome. I kiss my feet for leading me down the path that ended at your own; majestically, you own me, as you help me climb atop your throne. The hands, and arms that hold me might as well be impenetrable castle walls, like a cushion, you are my comfort, as you protect me from my falls. Your ears listen endlessly, never hinting at judgment or mistrust, the chemicals between us bubble, fizz, pop, and spontaneously combust. Laughter fills our home from the wee hours of the morning until late at night, there is a fire within...

Time stands still, and for the longest moment I look into your eyes in which I see reflected the most magnificent sunrise. Reds dance with flecks of yellows, and golden ember hues, as you wash over me in waves, your music takes away the blues. The radiance you emanate feels greater than the sun, your heatwave encompasses me, you just might be the one. My glass heart is known to shatter at the slightest indiscrepancy, so take me in your arms, as we swim together under the sea. I will be your orchestra, conduct me as you please, just as long as you promise to continue to soothe me like the summer's sultry breeze. I want to do with you what spring does to the cherry trees, cleanse me, make me blossom, and come give me my release. In return, I will provide you with my shoulder when you are sad and down, and assist you gain your balance in order to find solid ground. It has been way too long since someone else has also seen my worth, your eyes make my world go round, you are qui...

I may not have the nicest house, or the prettiest car, but one thing I know is that I have the kindest heart. Money might make you shine, and then glisten but if you silence the corporate slave within you long enough to just listen. You will see the beauty that surrounds you, each and every day; from the flowers that blossom without fail, and the skies that switch from blue to black to grey. The world is your oyster yet you choose to defile its worth, as you tear down the rainforests with vehicles that further pollute the Earth. Your oil spill may be your thrill, but it washes over me, blackens my body, and feels just like a pill. The kind that you swallow and makes you instantly sick, the type that was manufactured just to give you the intellect of a brick. They keep you supressed, opressed, and deranged, as the chemicals, and endorphins within your brain are rearranged. Estranged now, that you have joined the ranks of the rest, jaded and confused, as you continue your quest. H...

Once as chaste as a newborn lamb, temptation became my test, although I failed the exam, and joined the ranks of the rancorous rest. I could have had it all, as I set fire to the rain, if only I had the effort within me, to rise from the ashes once again. How does one get closure when their heart refuses to close? After all the words I should never have uttered escalated into blows? The cowardice within me was what prevented this man from being more than just a mouse, as we could have made a home together, but were barely even left with just a house. My cries, and pleas are drowned out by the sirens of defeat, as I left you bruised, and broken, careening wildly through the streets. Your smile was enough to light the city for a week, yet your silence resulted in me feeling like I had my tongue inside my cheek. Meek, and morbid is the aftermath of this man that was once a lion, our civilization could have been more illustrious than the Mayans. Yet instead we lost it all, traded i...

One last look at you, as my face filled with disgust; your pathetic lust, and inability to be alone, turned your body into rust. You feign happiness, as you walk around acting oblivious, ignorant, and hideous, yet you're really not all that mysterious. To the untrained eye, you may seem like a prize, but intelligent minds can see that you are really just disguised. Like the beast in beauty's clothing, your packaging was more appealing than your fruit. If you dare to look this way one more time, you will surely get the boot from my abundant loot. Concealed within a web of lies, you naively assumed that happiness could only come from another's eyes. Rotten, barren, and bare, your skin will one day hang from your bones like your mother's stringy, foul-smelling hair. Pull out a chair, and watch me some more, as you emulate my persona, until you cannot find yourself anymore. You may think you have it all, and that the wonders of the world reside within you, but your ...

Caught in a whirlwind of emotions as I race to reach the finish line, like some rivers lead to oceans, mine only seemed to lead me to landmines. Maligned, and derailed for the path that I have chosen, I will smarten up, and focus, as my heart thaws out, no longer frozen. I wash the tears away, as I record them while they circle the drain, one's train needs to get wrecked, in order to be whole again. Born again, revived, as I vow to return to being my own best friend. Half my life was spent in the shadows with the deranged, rearranged until my world was in disarray, and no longer looked the same. Tricked myself once, shame on me, fooled me twice, then drowned myself in a lake filled with my own self-pitying misery. I could either go through the motions or force myself to stay devoted, my future was once so bright, and then it just started to seem like it had been aborted. Short-circuited, won't function anymore, as I was tomorrow's child, then started to become yesterday...

After treading through murky waters, and surviving my darkest hour, I somehow managed to find a beacon of hope, no longer preparing myself for slaughter. You took my hand into your own, and now hold the key to my heart; I trust that you will keep it safe, even as the distance between us keeps us apart. Your eyes, the windows to your soul, are filled with kindness as they console; I accept that you might just be the missing piece that will make my puzzle whole. There has yet to be a dull moment, as minutes turn into hours as your voice caresses me through the phone; I am enamoured in my entirety as I can see that your body is devoid of a single wicked bone. Revenge and vindictiveness are quickly becoming ghosts from my torrid past, my heart races fast as it hopes this feeling never fades away, and will always last. Adventure and excitement align the forests of this enchanted land, as I meander through your Narnia, similar to Houdini, your every wish is now my command. Ready to emb...

Treaded through the darkness, and made it through the storms, as we encountered deserts, that threatened to ruin us from their warmth. The hurricanes between us ebbed and flowed until our boat was rocked, earthquakes created chasms of distance, as if our success were blocked. Tsunamis ripped apart our cities, and pirates tried to force us to abandon ship, causing me to question whether we were well enough equipped. Tidal waves rose and washed their victims ashore, yet somehow we managed to survive the subzero temperatures of our very own cold war. While it was calm, and through the rain, I saw you standing there, looking vulnerable once again. I asked myself if I was ready for another round, surprised myself when I found that I still had the strength to pursue this love that is profound. Without fail, and devoid of a single doubt within my mind, I knew I could not let go, as our love turned out to be one of a kind. Who else was I to talk to when my smile began to f...

I pick up the pieces that line the shores of the beaches of our love that will linger forevermore. Your eyes filled with sadness from the tears I made you cry, the same tears that drowned me, and made me choke at night. The hardest part was finding you, my soul's kindred mate, only to reap the consequences from the damage I caused that ultimately sealed our fate. As the master of my domain, I longed to right my wrongs, to make you feel the rhythm, and the lyrics of my heart's song. In you, I saw a future filled with fortune, fame, and fun; as my soul's cries resonated, telling me you are the one. The one to make my puzzle whole, your wishes, my command, as you make my bells endlessly toll, follow me to the promised land. On our magic carpet ride, we somehow lost our way, forced to land, and separate, until we meet one another halfway. From this day forth, I promise to only put smiles on your face, and if you feel restless or afraid, I will rescue you, an...

All this loneliness has always been a friend of mine, as I let go of my mother’s hand, and assumed my future would be fine. I locked the doors to my heart, saved the key for another start, watched you walk away after making your mark, then gave my ticket away and prepared to disembark. Critical until the bitter end, the shadows even taunt me proving that freedom is just around the bend, easy to comprehend, but difficult to apply, with a sigh I let it out, and spread my wings, ready to transcend. Ignored, and defeated, my army’s ego takes a beating, as my heart’s ripped out of my chest, and like a hemophiliac, I am left bleeding. Cries of confusion cajole coarsely through the air, barricading beauty from the beast that was barely there. Antagonistic anarchy aims to arrive to no avail, as I am all that I can be, an adventurer in search of the holy grail. I nurtured the seed of love, hoped to watch it grow before it went stale, only to be forced to accept that the hear...

Falling apart, ripping at the seams, as I accept the mess that's left behind from another broken dream. The tears fail to come for these eyes refuse to weep for someone who's decided that I am not worth the effort to keep. I made an effort to change, only saw you in my mind and heart, but our fears materialized, so it was over before it could even start. The sadness I possess in watching our fairy tale fail, makes me wonder, and question whether love will ever prevail. True to myself, I refuse to sacrifice more than I have inside, when it seems so easy for you to accept that our future has already died. With no hope in your eyes, you easily say goodbye, real love seldom appears, and is hard to come by. I will be here when, and if, you ever need a friend, but until then I hang my head low in defeat, and accept that this is the end. You win, another triumph under your belt, the queen of spade arrives, as I count my blessings, cut my losses, and smile as the cards have be...

I covered my eyes, and hid behind a veil of lies, always assumed you'd remain as consistent as the sunrise. I trusted you with my life, without considering you would ever wield the knife that cut into my back, and carved out my heart. Our legacy over before it could start. The stars above sparkle no more, their shine, and their lustre have been defiled like a whore. Crumbled, destroyed, like fallen empires. You promised me immortality, yet abandoned me, leaving me as the loneliest vampire. Lestat, and the Cullens are no match for this pain, that stings my eyes as they fill with tears like acid rain. Devastated, I turn away from you, no longer a victim of your love, I thought you could take away the blues, but instead more blues colour me from above. Denounced, and left in the streets to die after being stoned, you could have been my king, but instead you chose to be dethroned. You were my parachute that failed to deploy, sending me falling, stumbling towards ...