Epiphany.

Discovering parts of me buried beneath years of neglect, dust covered heart rusty from disrespect. Empty for so long though I acted like I was full, spreading myself too thin, it's no surprise my soul craves attention. My ego prevented me from seeing the truth, facts that were as clear as starry nights in the country sky. Narcissistic exterior that refused to let me progress, excuses became the barriers that convoluted my fortress. I was the shepherd to a flock of sheep that were really scapegoats, blindly leading the blind, accountability could have been my antidote. Claimed to have no expectations but the demon inside me that would not be exorcised demanded forgiveness for its infatuation with lies. I pulled the veil further over my eyes and filled my ears with cotton that made me immune to others' pleas to be heard and not forgotten. Ignorance was so much easier than acceptance, I avoided every lesson that could have been my blessing. Escape became the only option that I considered, as any attempt to face the harshness of my existence had me embittered. Blame became the flames that ravaged my reason and I the skilled arsonist whose self-worth suffered third degree burns from his own treason. Death by firing squad armed with silver bullets would have even failed to penetrate the facade that I wore like a cure. I acted unconsciously always on edge and ready to attack, more than the most explosive chemicals in an unstable lab. I must accept my past now so that my present does not also slip through my fingers like sand. I will never taste a drop of success unless I address the remnants of the reality that I have repressed. No promises to please, inaction is my archnemesis. I will rescue my spirit and save it from the entity by which it has been possessed. It's time to remove the layers of bandages and learn to love the wounds now that I am naked and undressed.