Sardonic Soldier.

Chewed up, spit out and cut down to the quick from too many false starts, 
I'm sick and tired of repeatedly being tricked and then torn apart.
Just because of my training, you deny me my heart, 
as though soldiers were only created to finish wars that you start.
I've been blamed too many times that I keep losing count,
stepped on landmines, and had to stop myself from bleeding out.
Treated like another weapon in your artillery, 
you better get the hell away from me, and my periphery.
You ripped open my chest without warning and carved out my organs, 
replaced all that made me human, 
with worthless purple hearts that were nothing but useless. 
And now all because I'm ruthless you pretend to act all surprised, 
as you let your jaw drop to the ground and you widen your evil eyes. 
Come a little closer, let me show you what I gained from this war, 
aside from this stop-loss syndrome, and a marriage that ended in divorce. 
All the time I was away brainwashed into battling your enemies overseas, 
my once faithful wife was fighting her own battle but all on her knees.
Even if I was just a toy, I would still hate you, 
spit in your face, and then probably even castrate you. 
You wasted my life so don't think I'm gonna spare you, 
I'll do wicked things until I really scare you, 
Take a little anxiety, inject it into your brain 
so you never have the chance to demoralize another human again. 
Salute you? Sir, no, sir, I'd be a fool to, 
do anything but pollute you, 
with the same kind of poison you used to, 
turn me into this monster who will not rest until you're abused too.

Written for a contest that provided Eminem's 'Toy Soldier' as its prompt.

Choices.

I'd rather be 
penniless but happy,
than overflowing with 
riches but miserable.

Much better off alone,
than surrounded by sharks
in a sea of bad company.

I'd rather be a starving artist, 
with no money for his next meal,
than withering away in a career 
where my disappointment 
cannot be concealed.

Better to be grateful 
with the little I have,
instead of blessed 
but oblivious;
no other outcome
could be quite as sad.

Crescendo.

Conceived on the back of a whisper, 
as soft as maternal breath on infant neck. 
Rooted in the innocence of schoolyard crushes, 
as devastating as grade school heartbreak and shipwrecks. 

It was the dew that dotted fragrant blooms at dawn, 
the gentle breeze that blessed the leaves with song. 
It started as a simple murmur, a tickle underneath my skin, 
then grew until it could not be contained in the house it was raised in. 

Four walls where it was nurtured, and took its very first steps, 
quickly became a prison that kept it repressed. 
Once it escaped, it outgrew its shackles, 
and set out for total world domination. 

No longer a speck, but closer to a splatter; 
a stubborn stain that would not be erased. 
It echoed through the mountains, reverberating from every cliff, 
then clapped with the thunder in the sky, 
nothing was quite as deafening.

It blared through the streets in loud speakers, 
and serenaded the cities like sirens; 
the sound amplified every time 
it bounced back and forth between the high rises. 

Like a bull on a rampage, it raged like a river, 
refusing to ever be ignored again. 
Its innocent purr was replaced by a ravenous roar, 
sure to intimidate its enemies into submission. 

Though it began like most fairy tales do with a rose, and a promise, 
it soon grew stronger from the reassurance it received from every kiss. 
When it opened its mouth, man and beast alike stopped to listen, 
trembling from the fear of ever warranting its vengeance. 

Faster than first responders could manage, 
it infected the world's nations like a violent epidemic. 
There is no manmade weapon quite as powerful as love, 
not even natural disasters could deliver such damage. 

When it is mutual, it is undefeated, and invincible as the gods; 
like the alpha, and omega, it is all some believe in. 
A force to be reckoned with, love deserves an extended round of applause. 
It started from single-celled humble beginnings but evolved into its very own universe.

Stagnant.

When life gave me playgrounds, 
I turned them into cemetaries gray, 
sentencing all signs of life to eternal decay. 

Trampled on flowers, then willed them to wilt, 
buried my brilliance beneath blankets of guilt. 

I poisoned myself until I was numb, 
safe from the specter that I'd become. 

Set myself on fires started by sorrow,
tortured by the terror of unknown tomorrows. 

Afraid of accepting that I am to blame,
averting my gaze as my future's swallowed by flames.

The inevitable can only be deterred for so long,
until it returns with a vengeance and robs my spirit of song.

The thought of progress makes my wrinkled heart race,
anxiety steals the smile right from my face.

My calm is replaced with crippling doubt,
as destiny derails turning silence to shouts.

Carnivals from my past reveal the cancer they masked, 
rotten from asbestos and littered with empty flasks.

This wasteland cannot sustain oxygen,
so I bury my head in the sand, concealing the pain I'm in. 

Corrosive; acid leaks from my alkaline pores,
yet I remain apathetic and let it pour onto the water damaged floor.

Nostalgic for the days when I used to try,
instead of this era emphasized by detrimental war crimes. 

Devoid of myself, I risk it all then rinse and repeat,
until I am submerged and drowning in the depths of my own defeat.

Burdened by insecurities that rip at me like birds of prey,
i fall apart, and fall to pieces, fulfilled as failure feasts for one more day.