Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Indoctrination Irritation.

I am angered by apathy and others' ignorance most often as their incompetence is unfounded
in an age where information is readily available at the click of a button.
Hatred and bigotry are not inherent yet are as common as if they were innate.
Learned behaviours prevail as an eye for an eye ideology has left the whole world blind.
I try to avoid judgment though it's difficult when I encounter so many passersby that are unkind.
A man's character should be assessed based on the contents of his heart
yet still some have been infected by greed for money and power, the reasons why wars start.
Incensed by the lack of empathy that exists in a world controlled by consumerism, as though worth can be measured by the materials we possess.
Annoyed by arrogance, I strive to stay conscious of my confidence and grounded by my acceptance of the impermanence of all.
Bothered by blind faith which burns throughout the human race, as we are forced into a system that has no place for free thinkers robbing them of a face.
The stigma attached to questioning things or daring to look inwards is like a scarlet letter that labels us as insane.
Yet a society that stands for nothing and falls for everything is somehow not deranged.
It begs the question of whether it's perception or deception that categorizes
depression as a chemical imbalance residing in the brain.


Sunday, September 22, 2013

Life of Pi.

My efforts are like rescuers that saved me when depression left me bereft and lost at sea.
Floating in a life preserver, with doubts inside of me that were more ferocious than a Bengal tiger. Dangerously close to the edge, and on the brink of extinction, I peeled back the layers of my guards that made my eyes cry like onions.
I watched helplessly as the remnants of my security were swallowed by the relentless waters of the Indian ocean, deprived of graves, their final resting place was in the Marianas Trench.
Somehow I made it out alive and managed to do so even though I was soaking wet and drenched.
I learned to tame the beasts that were my fears that if monetized, would have made me a billionaire. Somehow I stayed afloat, in retrospect, it was my hope and faith that worked behind the scenes to keep me safe and sound.
Ashamed to admit that there were far too many days that I believed it would've been better if I had just drowned.
Denial filled my head, echoing like screams that ricocheted in the Grand Canyon.
It was then that I discovered my spirit contained the indomitable strength and resilience that I had hidden twenty thousand leagues under the sea inside of me.
Like a lost continent found, my soul is the Atlantis that I've come upon.
Castaway from civilization is what it took for me to conclude that my perseverance is still cause for celebration.
Now I roar like Poseidon, I am king again, like Triton.
I narrowly escaped my perilous ruin, slightly scathed but otherwise okay.
The depths of my despair decreased as my lungs filled up again with air.
I have become immune to the trauma, radical acceptance helped me triumph over my salt water sorrows that tried to bury me alive underneath the sands of shallow, superficial drama.


Onomatopoeic Infatuation.

Drip drop as the intravenous tries to nourish me,
tick tock time passes and I wait in anguish for an end to my suffering.
Squish, crunch went my heart crushed under your foot like a cockroach.
Popped my dreams for the future like a balloon as I zip up the sutures, closing my open wounds. Clapping thunder crashed outside my window; it only rains now that you're gone.
We clashed like titans, our hungry egos were the ammunition that ultimately sunk both our battleships.
Clicked my heels together twice, three times, hoping it would help me like ruby red slippers on Dorothy's homesick feet.
In our last days, a cough could even set me off; I now regret that I could be so unkind.
Flushed now as I reflect on all we left behind; all the pieces of us scattered around the world make me groan as I realize we hardly even tried.
My stomach growls like a feral child raised by wolves and other creatures in the wild.
Grumble, as I wish we never crumbled collapsing underneath the weight of every rumble.
Praying for a hiccup to undo our history, hoping we can be restored and revert to loving one another in peace.
I hiss from being deflated, you were the oxygen inside my lungs.
Howling from the pain like an orphaned coyote wanting to be loved again.
All our work and effort was consumed by fires that we started on our own, our love went up in flames, ending in a simple puff of sickening smoke.
My bones rattled inside me as I grew spindly weak, starved for affection like a dog in heat out in the streets.
Ripped up like unwanted evidence, my spirit roared reeling from the loss.
If only my tires screeched and came to a halt instead of the failing brakes which plowed right over us. My sorrow shrieks silently succumbing to insomnia that makes it restless and thus, impossible to sleep.
Smashed, I became intoxicated drowning my anxiety as inebriation murdered my sobriety and left it splattered on the floor.
Splashing holy water on my face desperately longing to be a victim of this demonic heartbreak no more.
Swallowed me and spit me out as sirens wailed outside my window from signs of life and death that whizzed right by.
My frustration finally trickled out when it became clear that I would be safe again real soon, saved from the bullet of our drive-by romance that zoomed past my head, destined for the moon.


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